TL;DR: Cutting my abusive family out of my life and my 4 year olds life for good. Where do I go from here... How do I handle holidays and birthdays? How do I make my kiddo feel like it's ok and he's ok and this is not his fault?Long...My kid told me that his grandma was physically abusive towards him. I have been already distancing myself and son from her because of emotional abuse towards me recently from her. (Yeah, this is a mess.) I can tell when my kid is lying I asked him about the incident again and he's sticking to his story. His grandma's story was the one that changed. She then admitted to it, but just said they were wrestling. My son said something similar to me, but said he was scared.Then my mom tried to say, I force my kid to talk, I make things a big deal, and I am making my son paranoid. Typical gas lighting. Both conversations I had with my son and mom were seperate.I tried to grab my son to bring him in for a hug and it was around his neck and shoulders. I guess it triggered him. He got upset said he didn't like touched like that. The story I then gathered is they were wrestling. My mom put her hands on my son. I asked my son to show me what happened and he put his hands on my throat. My mom said it was his shoulders. My son said he was scared. I tried to downplay it to both of them because I don't know how they'll react. I let them both know it's never ok to touch someone like that. I am never putting up with this bullshit. This is more than a red flag.I feel like I should have known better. My mom was abusive to me growing up. And was giving me signs she hasn't changed. I guess that her changing was what I wanted to believe. Since she's been going to therapy I thought she was really trying to change. So I definitely believe my son because my mom has a pattern of abuse.So obviously she's never allowed to be alone with him ever again. I depended on her a lot for free babysitting. Kiddos daycare closes early and not opened weekends. I work late a few days a week. 2 jobs & a single mom. So I scheduled other babysitters for this week. I'm looking now for a new job with hours that work better with my son's daycare.My mom helps pay for where I live. She is also my co-signer because my credit sucks. So this is bound to be a problem.What do I even do now? I don't want my son to think he's punished for telling the truth. He loves his grandma and told me to not be mad at her. He's only 4. So what do I do...I have cut off most of my family already from my life because of abuse towards me before I had my kid. So I am going to be going through parenting essentially alone after this, but I know it the right choice. I feel like complete human trash. I feel so stupid for trusting my mom to watch my son. I have tried so hard to end the cycle of abuse with me. I am very into peaceful parenting. No spanking, no forced time outs, redesigned time outs into emotional checks instead. I feel like I failed. I am scared now to even talk about this like are people going to think I am a just a complete pos.The worst part of this all is not even how difficult this is for me it's how difficult this is for my son. I'm so heartbroken for him. I'm going to pick him up from school early, take him to the movies, and act like nothing is wrong. My poor baby. ): via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2HEUOAp
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