My 4 year old son's behavior is out of control and his doctor has no clue. Nothing has helped.

My son is 4. He is an only child. He has speech problems with pronunciation and is in speech therapy and occupational therapy. He has been in head start for two years and will start pre-k in September.He is very energetic to put it nicely. He has no interest in books, games, but loves making crafts. He can be very sweet and loving, but it only lasts for a few seconds before he is back at being energetic.He is very picky with foods and will only eat certain things, but will try new things. He can never stay still for any length of time before getting bored/distracted and moving on to something else. He will not sit and play, but prefers to dump toys on the floor, play for literally a few seconds, do something else, then refuse to pick the toys back up.He has aggressive behaviors towards my wife and I, but more specifically my wife. He will randomly hit us, slap us, jump on us, has bitten us before, all while thinking it's funny. He will do things such as pulling blankets off of just made beds, knocking laundry on the floor that has been folded to put up, trying to break lamps, computers, etc.We have tried spanking, time outs, taking things away, but we have also tried praising the good things he does. Spanking him makes him laugh at us and do the bad behavior worse.He will not take naps, does not want to go to bed. It's a literal fight to get him to sleep, but sleeps well after. He has told me on several occasions that he has never had a good dream, they are always bad. He will not sleep in his own bed, but prefers to sleep with me. He is scared of dinosaurs getting him.The biggest problem is with his aggressiveness. He will pick our dogs up by their necks, or back legs, and swing them around, or drag them.He likes to watch Netflix. He has certain shows/movies he watches, but does not generally like to watch new things.He has to have certain cups and bowls to eat/drink from, and if he does not get them, he will refuse to drink or eat.We have seen a professional and had testing done to rule out autism. His doctor said it might be OCD, anxiety, or depression, but not ADHD because at school he is perfect. He listens, he behaves, he participates and get's along with other kids.We are at our wits ends with his behavior and have no clue what to do. There are no forms of punishment that work, no amount of professional advice has helped, his doctor has seen his behavior.We spoke to his doctor yesterday without him, giving him a list of his behavior. He said something is wrong with him, but he has no idea what. He has never seen this before.I can give more specific detail if needed. via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2u0tr8t