Should we forsake our adoptive son?

My husband and I adopted a boy when he was a toddler. Our son, Malik, is black while we are both biracial (white/latino). We've tried to give him everything he ever needed, wanted, and asked for. We tried to help him keep his racial identity and encouraged he make friends in his own race. He did just that, and always refused to have non-black friends. Growing up, Malik has hated our race and us by proxy. It's been a struggle to keep our family together.Malik began to do drugs and commit crimes by sixteen. He's obsessed with "being black" and seems to think drugs, fights, sex, and bullying is the way to do it. I know that sounds racist BUT he is basically saying that's what it takes to be black. He recently got a girl pregnant and has refused to take responsibility. We've tried to pick up the slack, the girl's family refuses us, partly because of our race...Now he's twenty one, and he has done nothing with his life. He refuses therapy and schooling. He has a criminal record, including the police seeking him out for questioning. He abuses his current girlfriend. He steals from us. He says he hates us and wants us dead.At this point, I want to throw in the towel. I'm just tired. I never adopted any other children nor got pregnant, and I feel like shit for that. I know this might sound terrible but I regret adopting Malik. I wish I hadn't bothered. He has made our lives a living hell from almost the first day. All the love and support we gave him has been repaid with threats of violence. I'm in therapy right now, though I don't feel like it's doing much good. My life is full of regret and self loathing. I feel like I failed my son. He's not a good person and is contributing to the strife the world is full of.I want to wipe my hands of him. My therapist says it'd be wrong. I honestly don't care. I just want some peace of mind. My husband and I are even considering moving to another city without telling Malik. Still, my guilt and love keeps me grounded... What do the other parents here think? Do I abandon my son? via /r/Parenting http://ift.tt/2bTjvFb